The Wrong Way

"I don't do wrong things in life, I just carry out the right things in life in the wrong way"

If I had to name one thing that I think everyone should strive to do it would be doing the right thing. Hold the door open for people. Pick up trash when you see it. Don't say offensive things. Do your part. I don't think many people intentionally try to do the wrong thing, but if they didn't why do so many things still seem to go wrong? Probably not because we do the wrong things, but because we do the right things in the wrong way. 

I found this quote on my Facebook the other day after someone posted it as their status. Amidst a sea of mundane stati this one stood out to me, and I think it did because the person who posted it is someone that I've spent a few months thinking of as someone who did the wrong thing. 

I don't really need to tell the whole story, so I'll just say this: I really liked this person, and as far as I know, they really liked me. In the end, things didn't work out because we didn't get to see each other often and communication wasn't exactly his strong suit. We stopped talking completely for a long time and I spent the entire four months of silence mad at him for not trying harder. I got over it enough to talk to him again, but vowed to never be the one to start the conversation, because that way I could never be the one that got ignored. 

Looking at the whole situation from the point of view that we did the right thing in the wrong way changes everything. 

I realize now that he didn't do the wrong thing. He was just being honest with himself and with me that things weren't going to work. He just did it the wrong way. 

He probably could have just said "Melissa, this isn't working." or "This is going to be too hard." He could have just been honest. But really, he was being honest. He was just being honest the wrong way.

I probably could have done things differently too. I could have tried harder to communicate instead of leaving it up to him. I could have listened when he said it would be hard. I thought I was doing the right thing by trying to protect myself from getting hurt. I truly think protecting myself was the right thing to do. I just did it the wrong way. 

Just in case he's reading this, I'm sure you know who you are, and there's one thing that I want to say: I forgive you. I forgive you for not talking to me. I forgive you for being honest with me that us being "us" was going to be too hard. I forgive you for anything and everything that I was mad at you about. I forgive you because I know you tried to do the right thing, and that maybe we both just did things the wrong way. And I hope you can forgive me for being mad at you for so long. 

"I don't do wrong things in life, I just carry out the right things in life in the wrong way"

~Melissa Tamar